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I Think I Am Falling In Love


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#1 hommefile

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 05:12 PM

I am obsessed with him. OBSESSED.

Let's talk about feelings
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#2 hommefile

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 05:18 PM

What is it about certain people you meet and you're instantly just drawn to them like a magnet?? pheromones? psychology? do they unconsciously remind you of something/someone from your past? second time this happens to me in my lifetime, after the fiasco that was MrIfoldmyjackets who I met when I was 18? and truth to be told, this bad boy prince is very similar to him. Grrrrr
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#3 Demon

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 07:24 PM

It's not that mysterious

#4 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 07:24 PM

Congrats Hommefile
This time try and let him know in a more direct personal conversation ;)
Not that that's easy

There are studies where they put people in a room and observe the way they are drawn to each other
It's usually imprinted family dynamics that people have in common dispite sex, age or financial status
That can be a good or a bad thing

#5 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 07:25 PM

When it happens with me I try my best to pretend its not happening, cos its not good

#6 hommefile

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 07:46 PM

View PostDemon, on 18 June 2017 - 07:24 PM, said:

It's not that mysterious
it is mysterious. I constantly meet gorgeous guys and they're all like plants to me, yet this boy got me shooked from the get go

View Postfifiroxy, on 18 June 2017 - 07:24 PM, said:

Congrats Hommefile
This time try and let him know in a more direct personal conversation ;)
Not that that's easy

I am dating him! sort of.
actually we went on a couple of dates and then I was like "I can't see you anymore because I am too attracted to you" and he was like "WTF??" and then he insisted he is a good guy and I was like "let me think about it" and then a couple of weeks later I was like "ok let's be friends then" and he was like "okay" and I was like "Grrrrrrrr" and now we are officially friends but it's obvious that we are not

View Postfifiroxy, on 18 June 2017 - 07:24 PM, said:

There are studies where they put people in a room and observe the way they are drawn to each other
It's usually imprinted family dynamics that people have in common dispite sex, age or financial status
That can be a good or a bad thing
I think there's something about him that reminds me of my childhood but I can't figure out what, but it feels like I've known him forever

View Postfifiroxy, on 18 June 2017 - 07:25 PM, said:

When it happens with me I try my best to pretend its not happening, cos its not good
it's not, he has power over me
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#7 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 07:59 PM

Lol

Negotiate boundaries

Or just throw yourself into it and hope for the best

You are such a control freak!

I think you want him to break your defences down, a bit, in a healthy way?

Maybe

#8 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:01 PM

Someone needs to release you from your ivory tower

#9 Demon

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:03 PM

girls are so lame

#10 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:07 PM

I usually only date people that are quite forward with me because otherwise I will assume that they are not interested
But not just anyone who is forward
Its complicated

#11 Demon

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:31 PM

love is a construct of your mind to push you toward the ultimate goal and body's destiny of passing on your genes

love seems fanciful due to centuries of romanticisation in art.

we are all just workers in a factory that doesn't exist. the transient race of which we are currently part of.

#12 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:36 PM

Don't you think there is a spiritual element though

As in people that you love teach you something that you needed to learn?

Or is that just hippy bullshit?

#13 Demon

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:37 PM

no, it suggests the divine

there aren't really any lessons to learn

#14 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:43 PM

It's a bit of a sore subject tbh

Unhappy outcomes across the board for all concerned

I fall in love with people with very fucked up backgrounds and ultimately I can't deal with the emotional fallout, so I just try not to get involved anymore





#15 fifiroxy

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 08:50 PM

I was watching Chelsea Handler on Netflix and I can understand her point of view
Ie enjoying your own company and not actually being that bothered about dating anyone

She is my new imaginary BF

#16 hommefile

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 09:36 PM

View Postfifiroxy, on 18 June 2017 - 07:59 PM, said:

Lol

Negotiate boundaries

Or just throw yourself into it and hope for the best

You are such a control freak!

I think you want him to break your defences down, a bit, in a healthy way?

Maybe
see the problem is I am all 100% boundaries and 0% fun, NO FUN!! people wonder what a supposed player like him is doing with me, but I suspect it is that he assumes that I am eventually going to fall and it will be the most glorious victory for him. probably because there's so much chemistry between us. yes there's chemistry, physics, maths... all the subjects you can name


View Postfifiroxy, on 18 June 2017 - 08:50 PM, said:

I was watching Chelsea Handler on Netflix and I can understand her point of view
Ie enjoying your own company and not actually being that bothered about dating anyone
this is me, and it has always been me, I'm a lone wolf. this sort of thing always happens to me out of my control
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#17 hommefile

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 09:39 PM

View PostDemon, on 18 June 2017 - 08:31 PM, said:

love is a construct of your mind to push you toward the ultimate goal and body's destiny of passing on your genes

love seems fanciful due to centuries of romanticisation in art.

we are all just workers in a factory that doesn't exist. the transient race of which we are currently part of.
yo, what happened to you, bra. you need to fall in love (again?) and #beliebe again

View Postfifiroxy, on 18 June 2017 - 08:36 PM, said:

Don't you think there is a spiritual element though
for sure
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#18 Demon

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Posted 18 June 2017 - 10:16 PM

there is no love to fall in

while i can play along and enjoy it on a superficial level as though watching a movie or playing a video game, i must always temper the belief that it is anything more than just a chemical reaction to facilitate procreation. that's all it is, my love.

#19 hommefile

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Posted 20 June 2017 - 10:43 PM

"love" is absent in the animal kingdom, "love" pushes people into things like monogamy or celibacy, "love" is not present in >90% of the sexual encounters that happen. "Love" is neither necessary or beneficial for the survival of the species, your logic is flawed
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#20 Demon

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 08:08 AM

i think you will find "love" is not absent in the animal kingdom.

i think you will find "love" pushes most people into serious interpersonal relationships, marriage, starting families.

i think you will find "love" may not be present in "most" sexual encounters but it's uglier cousins most definitely are.

your problem is you can't separate the reality of love to your idealisation of it, which is defined by your spiritual beliefs. you are unable to view it through the lens of reason because belief occupies you...

#21 hommefile

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 07:29 PM

I think you're confusing the concept of love with other things like lust and sexual desires. I know you're obsessed with my belief system and think it's relevant to bring it up in every discussion, but unfortunately, Christians don't have the monopoly on love. Most people believe in love, as a separate and more profound entity to its "uglier cousins". This romantic love does not exist in the animal kingdom

Also: "serious interpersonal relationships, marriage" are things that work against the expansion of the species
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#22 Demon

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 08:02 PM

i'm not confusing anything. i never confuse anything.

i'm making the link between theistic beliefs and "love" because if you think the sensation of "love" has its roots in anything but science, then it's merely a belief. since you are a god lover, this opens the door for you to 'believe' in any other concepts that aren't rooted in logic.

the argument that "romantic love" (nice narrowing down there) may be exclusive to humans is meaningless. there are many things unique to humans that don't point toward us being anointed with spiritual powers. we can stand upright, ergo ghosts are real!

if you are arguing that "love" isn't a serious facilitator of the expansion of the human race, you've lost me.

#23 fifiroxy

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 09:06 PM

I find this conversation confusing?
Love is Love
In all of nature- human and otherwise, seperating humans from nature is what religions do, it's not logical

Maybe if you build a load of walls around you you don't recognise it


#24 fifiroxy

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 09:09 PM

On this day of all days let me say that animals can love, and that we are animals

:)

#25 fifiroxy

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 09:17 PM

I think seeing yourself as some kind of exeptional moral higher creature with enhanced powers of logic or incredible unnatural moral fortitude is maybe a bit egotistical and introverted and possibly delusional?.

I dunno unless you both really are superheroes that are going to save the world from sin and illogical behaviour

#26 Demon

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Posted 22 June 2017 - 12:05 AM

we are not "better" than other animals

but we have greatly superior cognitive function than, say, a shrimp.

#27 hommefile

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Posted 22 June 2017 - 07:22 PM

I am not narrowing down anything, it's obvious that I have been talking about romantic love this entire time- see title of thread

I am not saying that (romantic) love has its roots in God, I am simply saying that it cannot be explained by science, which is why I pointed to the animal world, where it's absent. Not everything can be explained by science, example: tears, why we cry when we're sad. There's no real benefit from it

It's pretty obvious to me that (romantic) love is bad for the expansion of the species: how many children can a man who falls in love and enters a monogamous relationship for the rest of his life have, as opposed to the caveman who screws every woman in sight? most animals do the latter, otherwise they'd be extinct

I love animals more than most people do, but we are higher functioning and for the most part morally superior to them. One of the reasons why you would save a human over a dog if you had to choose. To say that we're "all the same" sounds very cute and hippyish, but it's not accurate. There's a hierarchy even within the animal world, I'm sure you've never had a problem with killing a mosquito, and that you might not be so comfortable with doing the same to a dog
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#28 Demon

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Posted 22 June 2017 - 08:24 PM

I would not particularly save a human over a dog. It really depends on if I knew the dog or the human. I would sooner save my dog than a stranger, if I had to choose obviously.

i think i read something somewhere where they did an experiment on rats to see if they would release another rat from a cage, even if there was no benefit to them and even the disadvantage of having to share food, and they more often than not released. funny when you contrast that with the findings of the Milgram experiment.

animals are capable of empathy and other "moral" complexities. my guess is your opinion on the placement of animals beneath us stems from your worship of the anti-animal bestseller The Bible. We are not morally "superior" to animals, and this hubris is very bad. We are capable of more sophisticated thought on the matter, hence there are no puppy philosophers.

I'm not saying you are saying romantic love has it's roots in God. I am simply saying that just because things can't be explained by science (at the current time) it doesn't point to the existence of a spiritual realm. the belief in the spiritual is at least an agnostic perspective. If you believe in one, you can't fully discount the other.

I'm also not saying that "love" is the most effective tool to expand the species either. Just saying that it's the tool in hand. You know, imperfection... a reminder that He cut corners.

Oh and my guess is that we emit tears to signal distress to others.

#29 Demon

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Posted 22 June 2017 - 08:29 PM

show your boyfriend this thread

#30 Demon

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Posted 22 June 2017 - 08:41 PM

https://www.youtube....h?v=8lXjA7lxj_E




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